Sashimi: MOMMY! I want a microscope game on the computer!!
K-Man: MOMMY! I want a mmmovie!!
Me: FUUUUUUUCCCKKK (to myself, not out loud).
I had not even showered, eaten breakfast or taken my morning pills when all 3 kids started bellowing their requests simultaneously. I keep telling the boys that they need to be patient, learn how to be patient, be more independent, but my words totally fly over their heads. iBean is not even half a year old, so I cannot blame her for screeching when she wants to eat or sleep. But finding a new virtual microscope game for my 4 year old on the computer while she screams? Not a priority. Putting her down and letting her cry while I wait for K-Man to select a movie (which takes him a good 10 minutes sometimes)? Not happening.
So I get 2 boys who cry and whine at me while I take care of the baby. Then when she is fed and in her crib for naptime, I start on the easiest of the boys’ demands: movie insertion. Sashimi is mad that I am helping his brother before him, because clearly, virtual microscopy is more important. Although, in the grand scheme of child bran development, it probably is, it takes way more of my energy to set that up than to pop a DVD into the player.
There. Two kids satisfied, now to find some sort of game or virtual science thing for Sacha to do online. Ah…virtual electron microscope. Slide the petri dishes under and try to match them to their identifications. That should appease him. Oh wait, he cannot read. So I start reading the information to him as he looks at the images and tries to guess what they are. How the hell does he know what red blood cells look like?? Oh yeah, he’s Tony’s son.
Finally, 30 minutes and five virtual microscopes later, he wants to watch Scooby Doo. K-Man still entertained with his choice of DVD. iBean still sleeping. Mommy can FINALLY make her coffee, pour her cereal and get in the shower (nearly two hours after initially flinging my legs over the side of the bed). I let my hair dry on its own – one of the obvious benefits of a pixie cut. I can style it later if I need to vacate the premise.
Now, can I get some of the house tidied before the dictator-club starts calling out their demands? Oh screw it. I’m gonna sit and enjoy my coffee first.